A Good Imagination and a Pile of Junk

A variation of this happens most days ending in a Y:

- Get done with a half-hour block of doing something.
- Realize I’m hungry
- Go to freezer/fridge/cabinets looking for something
- Empty the ice trays into the bucket thingie and re-fill them.
- Get frustrated and go noodle around online.
- Realize I’m hungry
- Go to cabinets/freezer/fridge looking for something
- Get disgusted with dishes and wash two small plates and a spoon
- Put the washed two plates and spoon right back on top of the pile where I found them.
- GO back and noodle around online
- Realize I’m still hungry
- Go to the cabinets/freezer/freezer looking for something
- Wonder why the hell my freezer doesn’t work as the ice is still water.
- Walk half-way back to the computer, and yell “GOD DAMMIT”
- Go to the little boy’s room
- Go back and noodle around online
- Realize I’m STILL hungry
- Walk to the cabinets/cabinets/fridge looking for something.
- Grab something to eat, and put it on the counter
- Go back and check the market.
- Realize I’m still hungry
- Go back to the counter, open the partially and unintentionally thawed something to eat
- Put it in the microwave
- Hit start
- Go noodle around online, listening for the ding
- Check the weather both at the forecast.weather.gov and “thefuckingweather.com”
- Apply to another couple jobs that were just posted
- Realize I’m hungry
- Walk to the kitchen and look in the fridge/fridge/freezer for something to eat
- Walk back to the computer
- Sit down and yell “GOD DAMMIT!” again
- Go to the microwave, and re-start it to heat the now cold food
- Go sit down and noodle around on line.
- Reach for a now-empty bottle of diet dew
- Go back to the fridge looking for a new, nonexistent bottle.
- Look for boat shoes I can wear without socks because socks I’d have to add a “go find” entry for as well
- Shuffle off to the stupidmarket for new dew.
- Come back home and fetch my glass
- Go to freezer looking for ice cubes.
- Bitch some more that freezer doesn’t work, take ice cubes from bin.
- Enjoy half a bottle of diet dew while noodling around online and applying to what I hope isn’t the same job again
- Wonder what that bizarre nagging feeling is
- Realize I’m hungry
- Go to cabinets/cabinets/fridge looking for something to eat, annoyed by nagging feeling
- wash the same spoon, not realizing it’s the same spoon
- Get half way to my computer and yell “GOD DAMMIT!”
- Go back and turn the microwave back on
- STAND THERE WHILE BURRITOS COOK, WAITING FOR DING
- Flip burritos over and start microwave for 2nd half of cooking process
- Go noodle around online
- Realize I’m hungry
- Fetch food and bring it to computer, grumbling incoherently
- Exhibit an uncharacteristic moment of clarity as I realize what has just happened
- Open the blog posting interface and title a new post “The ADD Diet”
- Spend 20 minutes typing a reasonably accurate list of the events that took place.
- Noodle around online
- Look down at the plate of burritos and realize they’re cold.
- Eat them anyway.
- Hit Post

And people wonder why I get excited about cold speg-o’s out of the can.

“The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.” by Helen Keller

Nice, but uhm…

How the hell would SHE know?